Good morning, son
In twenty years from now
Maybe we'll both sit down and have a few beers
And I can tell you 'bout today
And how I picked you up and everything changed
2.10am, June 27th 2006 - 6 months ago, our little Tobypie was (finally!) born.
Ben Folds nailed it with the lyrics in 'Still Fighting It'.
'I picked you up and everything changed'.
Every decision we make is shaped by the presence of this little guy. It's truly unfathomable to anyone without kids. I don't mean that condescendingly. It's not that you can't imagine, as everyone has a good idea that you can't just swan off to the shops when you feel like it and leave the baby in front of the telly, but it's just unfathomable how one small entity doesn't just change your life but makes your life completely different. Nothing about it is the same.
Sometimes I really miss my old life and freedom and that's the hard bit. Wearing handwash clothes. Going out with my husband for a drink in a bar. Going out in the evening. Going out together. Not having a lounge full of brightly coloured plastic. Not knowing what its like to change a nappy at 3am. Wearing heels. Its not that we couldnt do these things but some of them would be ignoring our responsibility as parents, some of them are difficult to arrange and some just forgetting about it makes life much easier.Obviously, Toby has brought something close to magic into our lives. If human biology has anything akin to the supernatural, its how - despite the waking, the sleep deprivation, the days where the crying and whining really begins to grate at you - you love this little being with everything you have, beyond what you knew was possible.
But, there is no better contraception than a baby. We've both had moments where we said to each other 'can you imagine if we had a baby with anyone else?'.
We've come a long way, baby. 6 months of growth in every way.